3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
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