i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize
