we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
Randomize
