I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
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