i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
