he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
