I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
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