As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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