In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
Randomize