I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
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