Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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