Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Randomize
