I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
Randomize
