You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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