he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
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