white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
