if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I'm just crazy horny about you
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Randomize
