It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
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