didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Randomize
