Sry I called you an 8
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Randomize
