There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
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