She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
