i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
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