Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
