you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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