He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
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