i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Randomize