She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Randomize
