i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
you never un-have a 4some
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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