There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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