Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
Randomize
