i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
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