they need to just BURY HIM!
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
