It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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