he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize