she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
