his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
He passed out mid-signature
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
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