we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
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