I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
