At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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