She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize
