I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
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