Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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