the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Randomize
