Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
Randomize