Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Randomize
