Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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