The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Randomize
