I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
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