I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
There r osticjed everywhere
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
Randomize
