we have officially lost it.
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Randomize
